Noor Says NoHow do you spot an adult who crosses boundaries with children?
Sources reviewed on November 1, 2026. Based on public advice, see below.
Watch behavior, not people. Stop It Now lists behaviors to take seriously: an adult who ignores a child's limits, keeps secret interactions, insists on time alone, or brings up sexual topics around children. One sign proves nothing, but it's a reason to speak up. Children shouldn't have to carry this. Adults should.
What should you watch for?
From Stop It Now, in its own words. Do you know an adult or older child who:
- refuses to let a child set their own limits, or uses teasing to keep a child from setting one?
- insists on hugging, touching, kissing, tickling or holding a child who doesn't want it?
- frequently walks in on children in the bathroom?
- has secret interactions with children, or spends a lot of time texting or calling them?
- insists on or manages to spend uninterrupted time alone with a child?
- seems too good to be true, for example by babysitting for free or giving gifts for no clear reason?
- tells sexual jokes, shows sexual images, or is overly interested in a child's body?
Why does this include family and friends?
Because CDC says about 90% of child sexual abuse is by someone known and trusted by the child or family. Nemours KidsHealth says most cases involve a close trusted adult or family member who abuses the child's trust. Most people you know are not a risk. The list is about behavior.
What do you do?
Stop It Now says starting a conversation is an important first step. Say what you saw, and what you want: "I noticed you tickle her after she says stop. In our family, stop means stop." And keep your child away from one-on-one time if you're unsure.
Who can you talk to?
- US: Childhelp, 1-800-422-4453, or your state's child protective agency.
- UK: NSPCC, 0808 800 5000. Stop It Now UK also offers an anonymous helpline for anyone with a concern.
- Danger now: 911 or 999.
Read possible signs in a child and how to report.
Frequently asked questions
What if it's my own relative?
That's hard, and it's common for that reason. Talk to a counselor first if you want. Childhelp and the NSPCC take these calls, and you don't need proof.
I'm worried about my own thoughts. Is there help?
Yes. Stop It Now UK says its anonymous helpline is also for people worried about their own thoughts or behavior.
Keep reading
- What are the signs of child abuse in a young child?
- How do you report child abuse in the US and UK?
- Your child won't hug or kiss a relative: is that OK?
All topics are in the overview of parents' questions. The big picture is in the guide How do you help keep your child safe? A guide for parents. Want to practice this with your child? That's why the picture book Noor Says No was made.
Sources
Each source was read on November 1, 2026. These organizations are not connected to this site or the book.
- Stop It Now: Behaviors to Watch Out for When Adults are with Children.
- CDC: About Child Sexual Abuse.
- Nemours KidsHealth: Child Abuse.
- Stop It Now (UK): Preventing child sexual abuse.
- Childhelp: National Child Abuse Hotline.
- GOV.UK: Report child abuse.
This is general information, not a replacement for professional help. Worried about a child? In the US, call or text Childhelp at 1-800-422-4453. In the UK, call the NSPCC at 0808 800 5000. Immediate danger: call 911 or 999.
