Noor Says NoWhat do you teach your child if a stranger approaches them?
Sources reviewed on November 1, 2026. Based on public advice, see below.
Teach four things: keep some distance, say no, walk away, and tell a trusted adult right away. Your child can be polite and still leave. NCMEC also says adults should ask other adults for help, not children, so a request for help is a reason to go, not to stay.
Which tricks does your child need to know?
NCMEC analyzed more than 9,900 abduction attempts from 2005 to 2014. The five most used methods were:
- offering a ride,
- offering candy or sweets,
- asking questions,
- offering money,
- offering, looking for or showing an animal.
Most attempts in that analysis did not involve young children. NCMEC found many involved children aged 10 to 14. Still, these are simple examples you can practice at any age.
What does your child do?
- Keep a distance. NCMEC says to stand at least one to two arms' lengths away from unknown adults.
- Say no firmly. "I can't help you" works well.
- Walk away toward people. Back to you, a teacher or another trusted adult.
- Tell right away, even if nothing happened.
What if someone grabs my child?
NCMEC says: kick, yell and pull away. Adults may think a yelling child is just misbehaving, so your child should practice yelling clear words in a strong voice, like "You're not my mom or dad!"
Who can your child ask for help?
NCMEC says to look for a uniformed police officer, a store clerk with a nametag, or a parent with children. Point these people out when you go somewhere new.
What is your part?
NCMEC says the real responsibility lies with trusted adults. Know the routes your child takes, and talk to the school about its pickup policy. See the family password.
Frequently asked questions
Does my child have to be polite?
NCMEC says it is OK to be rude if someone is making your child uncomfortable. Your child can say no and leave without explaining.
What if the person knows my child's name?
That does not mean your child knows them. See the page about names on backpacks. The rule stays the same: ask first, and tell.
Keep reading
- Is stranger danger still good advice?
- Should your child's name be on their backpack?
- What is a family password, and how do you set one up?
All topics are in the overview of parents' questions. The big picture is in the guide How do you help keep your child safe? A guide for parents. Want to practice this with your child? That's why the picture book Noor Says No was made.
Sources
Each source was read on November 1, 2026. These organizations are not connected to this site or the book.
- National Center for Missing & Exploited Children: Tips for Parents: Preventing Abduction (PDF).
- National Center for Missing & Exploited Children: Tips for Parents: Safety Scenarios (PDF).
- National Center for Missing & Exploited Children: KidSmartz: rethinking stranger danger.
This is general information, not a replacement for professional help. Worried about a child? In the US, call or text Childhelp at 1-800-422-4453. In the UK, call the NSPCC at 0808 800 5000. Immediate danger: call 911 or 999.
