How do you talk to a young child about sex?

What is your child actually asking?

Often something smaller than you think. The AAP gives this example: a young child asking "What does sex mean?" may just wonder what the teacher meant by "line up by sex" for recess. So ask back: "Where did you hear that?" Then answer that question and stop.

Why start this early?

Because children learn from somewhere anyway. The AAP says that if you don't educate them, someone else will: other adults, media and peers. It also notes that children don't always hear or remember what you say, so it helps to come back to it.

What should you avoid?

• Talks that are all "don'ts". The AAP advises against them, because they leave out what your child can do.
• Talking down. Use simple language, but respect your child's intelligence and curiosity.
• Myths and nicknames. Give accurate information. For body parts, use the proper names, as in how to talk about private parts.

What does this have to do with safety?

A child who can talk about bodies with you has words if something happens. The AAP's body safety tips start with exactly that: language. Made-up names can make a topic feel secret.

What if you feel awkward?

Most parents do. Say so if it helps: "This is a little hard for me to talk about, and I'm glad you asked." Then answer. Your calm matters more than perfect wording.